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I used to have this one friend back in high school, and she was one of the very first friends I ever really made. Before that I used to go to private school, and I didn't really have any friends at all in private school. I miss her so much. We used to do everything together. For years she would come to my house, and we would sit up, watch movies with the lights out and talk about who we thought was hot, we would share our most deepest secrets with each other, we would go out with my mom to get pizza, go to white water, ect it was so much fun...Then one day she got a boyfriend and he didn't like me. In the end of everything we hardly talk to each other at all anymore. I've tried, but I don't think she really needs me anymore, when before hand we were pretty much inseparable. I think about her all the time, and how she was really a sister to me that I never ever had. I appreciate her friendship so much, but I'm afraid to let her know that. Every time I call her she's too busy, or she wants to go do something else. I know I should probably let go, everyone tells me that, but in a way it's like losing my only sister. It's so hard because I love her so much. I would still do anything for her if she needed me. I just wish she knew that. It's a miracle we even talk to each other once a year, and it's been FOREVER since I've even seen her face to face. Crazy how something once so strong has been what seems diminished. No matter what I will never give up on our friendship. She will just have to tell me first, because sometimes friendships can grow deeper (I'm not talking about in a sexual way) It's just hard, it's like losing my only sister that I ever had, and I'm simply not ready to give that up. <3

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lifeforsubstance

July 2013

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